If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
Can I color on your dick again?
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Randomize
