I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Randomize
