I need help removing her.
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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