As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
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