Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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