don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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