Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
She has the best kind of daddy issues
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
