Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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