need another drink. this is the easiest way
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
