just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
It's official drugs can't kill me
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize
