i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
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