is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Randomize
