Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Randomize
