i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
