gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
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