over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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