So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
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