it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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