im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
Randomize
