he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
