new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
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