And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
My financial advisor pointed out that 37% of my income is currently going towards "non-essential food items"
That's banker lingo for "you're an alcoholic"
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
