ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
Randomize