He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
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