Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
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