God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
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