hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
Actions speak louder than pants.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
Randomize