he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
I came so hard my ears popped.
Randomize
