But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
from now on my penis is your penis
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
Randomize
