There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
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