Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
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