Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
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