all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Randomize
