Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
Randomize
