I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize
