But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
Randomize
