Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
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