her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize
