I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Randomize
