Rock
Scissors
Fuck
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
Randomize
