All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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