ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
