My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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