Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
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