I am puke
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Randomize
