dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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