Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
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