It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Randomize
