My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
