Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Randomize
